Surprise... Surprise.....

All is fine with my blood work. The next step is for Jason to get tested but I think we are going to put that on hold until we find out how much this one is going to cost us. The last one ran us $900...YIKES!! Thanksgiving was good but the holidays get harder and harder each year. Every year that goes by I think this will be the Christmas that we will be pregnant or maybe even have a baby in our arms and every year those dreams are crushed. Jason would be an amazing father and that would be the most amazing gift I could give him. For some reason it is not our time and by gosh I am ready to know why! Thanksgiving and Christmas is about spending time with family and when you have no family of your own you start to feel shunned by society. Everyone carries on with their lives and we are just stuck wishing, hoping and now praying that one day soon this will all work out for us and we can have a baby! I wish I could just forget about wanting to be a parent so the pain would go away.

Here we go again...

I just got off the phone with our Dr in Dallas and he is happy to do a frozen transfer with our last embryo. Man is he a serious guy but I think that's why he is so good at what he does. He wants us to wait until I have cycled twice since I miscarried. So... bring on aunt flow so we can get this started. The tricky part is going to be getting the embryo down to Dallas. The two offices will have to coordinate the transfer. We have the choice of using fedex or driving the tank with our little one down to Dallas. Again he does things very different... no birth control or Lupron just straight estrogen tablets and progesterone injections. I will only have to go down two times, once for a sonogram and then for the transfer. I sent pics of our last embryos and he said they look really good and the one we have left is our best one. He also said we were making a good decision by using this. Why keep it frozen!? Throughout our conversation he was quizzing me making sure I was paying attention. I learned from our first appointment to take notes. I ended up with six neon green sticky notes with scribbles on stuff all over. I will have to rewrite everything so if I am quizzed again I will pass. :) He will call in my new meds on Monday and he wants the embryo down in Dallas with in 10 days. He is ready to get this going and so are we!!

more blood work

Not sure if anyone is still reading but thought I would continue to post. Since last weeks blood work came back normal I was sent to be stuck again for more blood this morning. I had to go to Quest diagnostic which is just a lab. It was nice not to go to the ob/gyn office, sometimes it's really hard to step in there and see all the ladies that are pregnant there for their checks. They are starting with me on the chromosome testing and if I come back fine then they will check Jason. I'm sure these will come back fine as well. Not that I want something like this to be wrong I still just want some answers. I feel like my emotions are finally getting under control, not sure if Jason would agree. It's been a tough 3 weeks I try and hide everything which doesn't help me but I guess I just don't want people to know how I really feel. I also know that I'm not the only one who has gone through all this but it's hard every time you turn around someone is pregnant or complaining about their children. As you can maybe sense I am still a little angry I'm sure it will pass with time.

blood work results

The nurse finally called me back last night and said blood work looked fine so the next step would be chromosomal testing. They will do that next week and if mine comes back fine they will check Jason. We may be going to Dallas again in January we received a storage bill for our 1 frozen embryo and it's not worth paying the amount they want. Our choices are to discard it, use it or pay for the costly storage. We are thinking we will use it. I have a phone consult with the Dr in Dallas on the 24th so we will see what he says.

Went to Dr appt this morning

I had my blood drawn yesterday and the nurse had the results for me this morning. She said my hcg level was down to a 12 which means I did miscarry. I also had my thyroid checked and that was with in normal range. I got to sit and talk with the Dr about everything with our infertility, miscarriage and my symptoms I had while pregnant for those few weeks. I told her how my bones hurt I was so cold and my hair was falling out like crazy. The not so nice nurse told me yesterday that pregnancy symptoms are different for everyone and that mine were normal. The doctor of course said they were not so normal. She is wanting me to start taking a baby aspirin everyday and ordered some testing. They took 5 vials of blood to check for antiphosphlipid syndrome, Lupus and she said something about rheumatoid. If those all come back fine we will do some chromosomal testing on both Jason and I. She was a little bothered by the doctor down in Dallas not doing a pregnancy test before doing my mock transfer. I told her really what are the chances that I would be. She said you would be quite surprised. We should have results back by Friday or Monday.